I've been there. And there's no t-shirt to go along with it.
It was a hard, strange feeling in the pit of my stomach when I realized I didn't fit and probably never would. Every church has cliques; we as a species crave societal order and cliques are a part of that need. Old Church was small-ish and I'm not here to bash Old Church. Old Church is just fine for a lot of people and I actively encourage those who fit there to keep going.
I wave and smile in the halls but would get a nod here and a grunt there. I didn't get calls for playdates for the kids like the other moms do; in fact I got turned down for them. I used to teach the elementary school girls small group at Old Church. I cooked dinners, donated food and did my share of volunteering; but when I needed the same help...the deafening silence was humiliating.
So...I left. I went church shopping. I finally just went to a church recommended by a friend and am feeling better about having a place.
I felt a nudge a while ago, the nudge that I needed to be somewhere else. Now, God knows me and it took a kick in the tush to get me on the path He wanted me on. The kick was the cancelling of the kids programs for the summer.
Are you feeling that nudge? Is God's whisper dancing on the breeze that drifts by your spiritual ear urging you on to better things?
Take a moment: put down your cell phone. Turn off the tv. Turn off the radio. Find a quiet place to be still with Him, so you can hear the words He whispers to you. Remember, God doesn't shout. He doesn't always use neon signs (although I for one, wish He occasionally would). In 1 Kings 19:12 we read about how God spoke to Elijah in a gentle whisper. http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=1%20kings%2019:12&version=NLT
That's the voice you need to listen for.
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